Suit Shopping with a Growing Boy

On Sunday, I took Secret Service clothes shopping. Secret hates clothes shopping and tries to convince me to go to the store without him, buy several varieties of outfits in various sizes for him, bring them home, have him try them on and then return whatever doesn't fit. Actually, Secret doesn't feel it is necessary to try on clothes, he thinks you can get an accurate measurement by holding the clothes up against your body.

Secret Service needed a new suit for the Speech and Debate class that he inadvertently signed up for and has been trying to quit ever since he got to the class and understood that he would actually have to give a speech or debate someone about something. Supposedly, he has written a speech and possibly even memorized it. Science Girl and I have not seen or heard the speech and Secret says if he has anything to do with it, we won't be seeing or hearing him perform it.

I asked a few friends about places to buy a reasonably priced suit for my growth-spurting boy. One friend suggested I get a suit for Secret at a thrift store. I explained that Secret has a rule about not wearing clothes that have been previously worn by others. While we drove to the clothing store, Secret, in more of an expansive mood than usual, chatted about how his first car is going to be a Mercedes. Secret reviewed some data on his phone and announced he can get a new Mercedes for $34,000 and if he earned $10,000 a year, he'd pretty much have the money in a little more than three years. Secret was not forthcoming on how he'd earn the $10,000 each year but didn't seem worried so I decided not to worry either. I am driving a Mazda so I wished him well and reminded him to budget for insurance.

I took Secret to a discount clothing store. He was unimpressed with the selection and said he suspected it was a consignment shop (which it was not!). While there, for the first time, Secret gave me a few more details, supposedly from the Speech and Debate teacher. Secret said the suit had to be solid black or grey, no pinstripes or navy. Secret also said the teacher told them to buy a good quality suit, "an expensive suit," because they'd be wearing it a lot and should look good and be comfortable. Not finding anything that met that criteria, we went on to another discount menswear store. In this store, Secret became insistent on buying a suit that I could tell was already too small for him. Trying to be patient (it isn't really one of my virtues), I explained that as a teenager he won't be getting smaller and instead, will be growing larger. I said that a suit that is too small today will be even smaller tomorrow. Thinking I'd handled that well, I was not happy when Secret said, "I disagree." However, it made me appreciate his potential for debate, his ability to defend a ridiculous position.

When we found a suit that was solid black, fit him and that he actually looked terrific in, Secret was unhappy. He wanted to spend all my money and the suit was a reasonable price. He perked up a little when he discovered I'd have to pay additional for alterations. We pick it up next week.